Saturday, March 3, 2012

I'm Not Patsy Cline

I was playing  in a bluegrass circle and had already sung all the bluegrass songs I wanted to sing and called out Walking After Midnight, one of my favorite songs to sing. “Are you going to sing that song the way it’s supposed to be sung?”   Evidently Bruce didn’t approve of my interpretation of it and that’s all it could ever be, my interpretation because in case you haven’t noticed I’m not Pasty Cline.  And that’s pretty much what I told Bruce before a guitar war broke out over how to play the song.  It’s kind of hard to sing when the guitars are having a war.

I decided a very long time ago that the best thing I could do was just be the best me I could be even when I’m not sure what that is.  That’s not always a popular approach to take.  There’s always someone who wants to tell me how I should sing, dress, act, teach, or be. And they act like their perception of reality has more value than mine.  It doesn’t.  It took me awhile to embrace that little nugget of wisdom.

If you base your self worth on the shifting perceptions of others you will always be at the mercy of their emotional state and standing on shaky ground.  I’m not standing on shaky ground. This is who I am and I am digging myself and loving my life.  There will always be a Bruce who thinks I should sing, do or be a particular way.  The problem with that is it makes it impossible for something new to be created and to unfold.  God didn’t put me down here to be Pasty Cline, he put me down here to be me and that’s just what I’m going to do, be me.  Who are you going to be, yourself in all your authentic glory or a pale imitation of someone else?  It’s your choice. It’s either fear or love baby, what’s it gonna be?