Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Whose Life Is It Anyway?

      I like hanging out with guys and not just because they almost always feed me and tell me things they think I should know but probably don’t. I like hanging out with guys because they have good toys. Guys have recliners and big, BIG televisions. I have books and music. I like books and music but they’re not the same as recliners and big, BIG televisions with lot of gadgets. I like to get in touch with my inner guy once in a while so when Revel asked me to swing by on Sunday for lobster ravioli and a movie I was more than happy to put it on my calendar. He even offered breakfast first and I didn’t have to cook.
  When I pulled up to the curb  Revel had tea and French toast waiting for me and after I was well fed he brought out his toys. I became an instant fan of Bushnell binoculars and am trying to figure out how I can afford a pair yesterday.  That was my favorite toy. Revel’s was his Roku thingy which instantly plays any movie on Netflix. I was not convinced. Did I mention that it was a big, BIG television? I was, however willing to be persuaded so I settled back in his rather large and may I add very comfortable recliner while he looked for a movie. Revel and I have been friends for over fifteen years and he knows where the bodies are buried and he knows me. He put on a movie that was just perfect for me and perfect on a big, BIG television screen, Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland.
    I like Tim Burton and love Johnny Deep. I was not a big Alice in Wonderland fan until I saw this movie.  Near the beginning of the story Alice says, “Since I fell down this hole I’ve been told what I must do and who I must be. This is my path and I shall decide where it goes from here.”    
  That precisely sums up how I feel these days which I’m sure comes as no surprise to anyone. “This is my path and I shall decide where it goes from here.”  Alice has the enviable task that we all have at various times in our lives; she has to find herself for the sake of humanity.  
  She discovers what we all need to learn, sometimes more than once, it’s immensely liberating to be who you are.  You are not buffeted by the vagaries of people you’ve given your power to. You don’t have to play small so people won’t feel insecure around you and you don’t have to grow what you do out of proportion  to make yourself feel secure. You know in the very marrow of your bones that who you are is enough. When you know that you have something no one can take away, the strength of authenticity and personal integrity.  It is worth every seemingly impossible task that presents its gift to you.
    Living the life you think you should because you are afraid to live the life you want is no life at all. It’s either fear or love baby and being anyone other than who you really are is not love.  Be you, be great. The world needs your gifts.  It’s only impossible if you believe it is and trust me it’s not.     


Diane said...

Whoa! Just what I needed to hear this morning. I love what you've shared. Especially the part about "be you, be great." Thanks for the kick in the butt!

Debra said...

Thanks. I needed to hear it too. I tell my students often, "It's never too late to be great." Then it hit me, that means me too.